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you eat cake, that's what... by *YouInventedMe:iconYouInventedMe:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open


dear friends
please stay close so I can
finally
get some sleep
always there's this shaking
so
I need your arms

and I think I'm finally
seeing the pattern in sunsets
and sunspots
and melting to puddles
when the words stop

theirs is the kind of alone
that
we
can beat

and I don't think it's wrong
to lay our heads together
or sing away
bad breaths
with the same voice

I'll hold your heart
safely
in my
well
worn
hands
(anytime)

just let me
©2006-2009 *YouInventedMe
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Submitted: August 2, 2006
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Comments: 43
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Author's Comments

Full Title: you eat cake, that's what it's for.

all my friends are beautiful
I'm the black spot on their records
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Comments


~IrishHippiePoet:iconIrishHippiePoet: Aug 2, 2006, 5:48:51 PM
"theirs is the kind of alone
that
we
can beat"

--Oh wow. this is...great. Your structure is amazing, and the feeling behind it takes my breath away.

--
Just tune in, turn off, drop out, drop in, switch off, switch on, and
e x p l o d e.
*YouInventedMe:iconYouInventedMe: Aug 2, 2006, 6:08:09 PM
:) thank you ever so much

xo!
~bRoKeNgRiN:iconbRoKeNgRiN: Aug 2, 2006, 7:52:25 PM
Awww. . . I love your ending. :) Very nice poem.

--
You need only believe. .
~kay-d:iconkay-d: Aug 2, 2006, 9:05:44 PM
Your friends sound lucky to have you.
They say actions speak louder than words, but some time or another, I think we have to tell people we're there for them otherwise they forget.
Such a nice piece. I like the 'kind of alone' line too. :)

--
†
Writing is the only thing that when I do it, I don't feel I should be doing something else.
- Gloria Steinem
:boing:
~fortymudshanks:iconfortymudshanks: Aug 2, 2006, 9:08:23 PM
and I think I'm finally
seeing the pattern in sunsets
and sunspots
and melting to puddles
when the words stop

and

and I don't think it's wrong
to lay our heads together
or sing away
bad breaths
with the same voice

were my favorites. :)

Here is a :headbang: for the work and a :hug: for you

(Either my heart or my tired brain tells me that emotes can say it all ;) )

--
What would the world be like if we tried to be kind as hard as we tried to be beautiful?
*YouInventedMe:iconYouInventedMe: Aug 2, 2006, 10:15:56 PM
thank you for all facets of this comment.

xo!
*YouInventedMe:iconYouInventedMe: Aug 2, 2006, 10:17:00 PM
I'd say they work quite well. :)

thanks

xo!
~ledbypassion:iconledbypassion: Aug 3, 2006, 12:27:46 AM
this is ridiculously wonderful. you are very talented with words. :)
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