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love, I let you
linger on
in places yet unseen
in the silent space
between
initial sparks
and how we're wired
my

dear, you are
discovered in
every memory undeparted
every poem I've ever
started
even haunting
odd synapses fired
I

fear, forever
following
a hand unclasped (still shaken)
a heart unheard until it's
taken
time to rest
uncommon sense retired
why

it's my
attempt
to ingest
starshine
'til admired!

it's my
intent
to become
all you
have desired.
©2008-2009 *YouInventedMe
:iconyouinventedme:

Author's Comments

(be) still my favorite shade



written for ~KneelingGlory's challenge
here: [link]


my first ever challenge submission

Comments


love 2 2 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconout-of-spite:
:excited:
I wish you the best of luck!

I really enjoy how you broke apart the stanzas in the middle of the lines - it catches attention and makes you finish reading it.

--
~*~We Survive What We Can't Change~*~
:blackrose:Regrets are mistakes you don't learn from:blackrose:
Surrender to the Truth: [link]
Believe the Lie: [link]
:iconyouinventedme:
thanks

I don't think it's really a
competition, as much as it's
a prompt to get you writing...
more of a challenge against yourself, I suppose

haha


xo!

--
an antique arms and armor expert
:iconheartmaker:
Stunning poem. In my opinion it's definately one of your best.

--
A baby seal walks into a club.
:iconyouinventedme:
thank you very much


xo!

--
an antique arms and armor expert
:iconyouinventedme:
:heart:!


xo!

--
an antique arms and armor expert
:iconprosthetik:
I just love every single line. :)

--
"In dreams emotions are overwhelming."
:iconr-mitchell:
ohmygod this is very good. you are a master craftsman. the rhymes in this completely won me over, i want to spread them out over giant scrolls in fancy lettering.
:iconohsostarryeyed:
you're such an amazing writer. i won't even pretend i'm not jealous.

--
i like to
put haikus where they
don't belong.
:iconyouinventedme:
:D thanks so much


xo!

--
an antique arms and armor expert

Details

September 22, 2008
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